A lot has happened since June and my last blog posting. My weekly foray into improv came to an end late in July. Reflecting on the experience as a Village Idiot reminded me of the two types of hard. We all do what is hard and difficult sometimes and I think those difficult experiences come in two varieties.  

To figure it out the question is “how is it hard?”

 The Hard Way #1: The new skill just isn’t your thing. These are the times you find yourself playing to your weak suit in your personality or interests. Sometimes we even try to turn a weakness into a strength.  Isn’t that a job interview tactic, to explain how you did it?  Actually spending your time on this is a waste of time, on top of being really frustrating (read Now Discover Your Strengths). The point is that your time is better spent developing your weaknesses only to the point that they don’t detract from your strengths.

The Hard Way #2: You are engaging your natural interests and find the new task somehow interesting on top of being difficult. It is much easier for you to get up for this type of challenge because you actually like it. For example, a couple of years ago I was teaching a workshop in the Southern Tier of NY and one of the participants said he didn’t like to work hard. He looked likean outdoorsman so I asked him if he hunted. He loved hunting turkey. If you know anything about turkey hunting you know he spent hours getting his equipment ready. He got up before the crack of dawn to get dressed, getting his camouflage on just right, driving and hiking to his predetermined hiding spot. He in position ready to go before the sun came up. Then he patiently called the turkeys in to get a chance for one good shot. In other words he worked his butt off at something he really liked but he didn’t think of it as work. And it wasn’t to him. 

That’s the point. When we find those skills and talents the real challenge is to push ourselves in that direction. We can take on these type of challenges long after everyone else gives up in frustration because we enjoy it!  This is where we find our true potential, where we come the closest to being our best selves.

What I’ve noticed though, over the years, is that we sometimes diminish what comes easy for us as if to say “If I can do it anyone can. ” Well, that’s not true!" Each of us has unique gifts not everyone uses them.

Harry Chapin described two kinds of tired. One is when you’ve worked all day for someone else, the other is when you’ve worked all day for yourself. A good day of the former isn’t as good as a bad day of the later.  That's important when you lay your head down on the pillow at night to sleep.

What are your unique skills and talents? If you truly don’t know, spend some time to find out what they are and do it soon! Use and develop those skills as much as possible. Like Harry said, you will find doing this type of hard work satisfies your soul.

 After this amount of time I've come to a conclusion or two.  Number 1 this is really hard to do well.  And Number 2  I am not close to good at this at this point. 

 

I've come to an insight or two through this humbling experience.  One insight is that this learning experience is no different than any other one. At first you have no idea what you don’t know. That’s when you take on a new skill and figure you’ll get it in no time. Next you realize that you don’t know some very important information. Very humbling! It is easy to quit at this point because you don’t have too much invested in the learning. If you can keep pushing yourself out into that process you’ll come to a place where you begin to understand at least some of what you don’t know and maybe, just maybe, even begin to know what to do. 

 

It is that gap between beginning to know what to do and actually being able to do that I now find myself. There are many more skills of improv that I am clueless about, but the curtain is beginning to go up. That is an important part of the learning process for us to remember. It is frustrating to know you are clueless. We don’t like it and we will avoid looking stupid. As leaders, taking note of who leans into that uncomfortable stage and then helping them through it can make a tremendous difference in not only the skills and productivity of our teams but also the depth of trust and maturity of our teams. 

 

Who would you trust to lead you into a new area that you know nothing about and let yourself be completely vulnerable? That is risky! For a leader it ought to be quite humbling to think “they trust me enough to give up what they know to learn and do something new.” 

 

What new process or skill have you taken on recently at the risk of looking foolish? When and how do you exercise you risk muscle?  How can you help someone who is in the middle of learning and sturggling with what they don’t know or the realization they don’t have the skills yet?

Just in case you haven’t seen the infomercial or heard the word Fushig, here is what you find when you Google the word. 

 

 

Clicking on the Fushigi site you read that the operator (you) exploits the reflective properties of the sphere and that through specific hand and body isolations the ball appears to move on its own and even float. You are encouraged to buy the Fushigi for $19.99 with the following: "Want to unlock the secrets behind Fushigi? Fushigi will mesmerize the mind, confuse the senses, and blow away your friends."

The truth is that it (Fushigi) is a ball - nothing more nothing less. It isn't the ball that defies gravity it is the skill of the practitioner. I wish I had a nickel for every time someone watched me or another juggler and then tried to get their hands on our props. Somehow they are convinced that it is the props and some magical property they possess that makes them move. It couldn't possibly be the hours and hours of practice the performer has put in. It must be the prop. That is exactly what the Fushigi advertisement wants you to believe. It is a trick and once you know the trick you can blow away your friends.   

 

 

Leadership, like Fushigi (aka contact juggling) and good magic is a skill. It isn't a simple trick done out of sight of the audience. It takes skill. Most, but not all, people can get better and maybe even proficient at the skill. The problem is, that just knowing what to do isn't enough; you must also be able to follow through and do it! In other words you have to have the skill. That part, the doing it, takes practice, hours and hours of practice perhaps over the course of years to become proficient. A teacher/coach can help speed up the learning process greatly but the coach can't make you have the persistence it takes to put in the time to become proficient. No teacher can put in the time for you. You have to do it yourself. 

If you want to be good at contact juggling (Fushigi) get a coach and put in the time to learn as much as you can and to practice. The same goes for becoming a better leader. Become a student, get a coach, take classes and learn from your inevitable mistakes by putting your time in.

 

Next time we’ll talk about why so many Fushigi balls are being returned to the stores where they were bought. 

 

 

 

 

 

Right now, where you work, there is an invisible force controlling your department and organization. It’s invisible and yet everyone knows about it. Sometimes its effects are vital and important to your organizations success. At other times though, it has a negative effect. When it has a positive effect it might be talked about but when its impact is negative rarely is it discussed. 

What in the world is it? Group Norms! Every group has them and they develop almost overnight. In a graduate class I taught this past summer the group established the first night where they sat and how the chairs were aligned in theater style. They expected me by this arrangement to come in and lecture to them from the front of the class. Every Tuesday and every Thursday I would enter the room and ask them to rearrange their seats into a circle. This norm was so strong that in 12 classes I could not break it! We even talked about it. 

What are some of the norms in your workplace? Which ones help your group? Which ones get in the way? Have they ever been talked about in a meeting? For example why is it that we do …..? There have been times that I’ve asked these type of questions and been pressured to stop. There can be a lot of peer pressure to leave things the way they are and to not pursue why. Sometimes I must admit I’ve bowed to the pressure but sometimes I dug deeper to figure it out. On more than one occasion I’ve found a process that was out dated and changed it. In every instance the change increased our productivity and effectiveness. 

Who’s questioning the norms where you work?  Do you? Does anyone? How are they treated when they do question current practices? Leaders question those comfortable norms and practices and get more out of their groups.

What is a norm where you work that you really don’t understand?